I was looking back through some old files in my note app (I oftentimes will write up an idea, story, or start a blog entry there and forget about it, as was the case here) and cleaning out some old stuff I don’t need any more when I came across a note just called “vent.” Uh-oh. I read it and thought, “eh, why not share this random, old note for funsies while I sit here, waiting, caffeinated and procrastinating because I should be doing my daily squats instead?” And here we are.
If life were a movie, this would be foreshadowing, I think. Right? It’s dated January 1, 2020. I mean, it wasn’t the end of the world kind of stuff, but a frustrating work day that I felt I needed to write down to feel better about it (I do this a lot, just to “vent,” as the write-up was titled, and then I’m able to move on easier). Anyway, I thought I’d share it because, to be honest, with the way things have gone this year it’s almost funny now. “Almost funny” because it’s still frustrating to think back on days like that, and they still happen sometimes because… well… life. But compared to the rest of 2020? Funny.
So below is something I wrote on January 1, 2020. And I’m just gonna smile and be glad today is a better day than that one, and now I’ve got that someone that loves me sleeping in the bunk about five feet behind me, and I can go cuddle with him right now if I want (I’m sitting in a dock door waiting to get unloaded). In fact…
copy, paste, post, cuddle…
So I’m venting. Don’t read it if you don’t want to be a part of my pity party. I won’t be at all offended if you don’t wanna get in on my dumps! And yeah, I know it’s dramatic and petty and dumb, and there’s much worse things I could be dealing with, but dammit, it’s January 1st – the day I’m supposed to feel fresh, and new, and invigorated, and ready to tackle good ol’ 2020. But yuck. I’m not!
Well, f*** today. I went to bed last night (New Year’s Eve), alone but not feeling social either, at 11:30pm because I had to get up in the morning to start a very scheduled-out day where everything kinda had to go right for it to all work. I woke up at midnight to fireworks (I was staying at the Pilot in Gary, IN). I don’t blame anybody for that. It was a New Year celebration and for anyone that’s stayed at this Pilot or the TA across the street, you know there’s also a fireworks shop like practically next door. But I get it. Celebrate, fine. I fell back asleep once they were done.
Morning came. I was ready to start my day. And my new year. I put a big, partially fake smile on my face and it lifted me up a bit. It was all gonna be just fine. I had my schedule all written out. Took a shower, did my pre-trip and pulled up to fuel up my reefer. The stupid pump wouldn’t work right. Here we go – I could pump a trickle to keep it going and that took foooorever – and then I had to do it twice to get it topped off because it reset halfway in. Whatever. Pain in the butt, but okay. Move on.
I drove a little over an hour to my delivery location where I was just gonna drop my loaded trailer and hook to an empty one like we do a million times at this place and move on to my next thing for the day. I pulled in at about 10:15 and was turned away because they don’t open until 4pm. This was unusual for this place, even it being New Year’s Day. Drove to a closed Sam’s Club down the road where I could park my beast of a truck out of everyone’s way in freakin’ Chicagoland while I made the phone call to our weekend dispatch and wait for instructions as to ‘what the hell now?’ I had a loaded trailer waiting for me in Fond Du Lac that needed to be live unloaded in Milwaukee at 7pm, and if I was able to stick to my schedule I so proudly came up with, I’d even make it home for the night where I could sleep in my own bed and remember I have someone waiting there for me that loves me and wants to cuddle with me. But now my pretty little schedule was out the window (as what almost always happens with schedules and plans, right?).
Thankfully on-call was great and came up with a plan. I dropped my trailer right there where a co-worker met me, took my bills and was going to drop it for me after he dropped his own trailer – after 4pm when the damn place reopened (seriously – they never close, not even holidays usually – for real). This way I could still get my Milwaukee load delivered on time. Yay. And the silver lining? Because that first place was closed, I couldn’t hook to an empty trailer and bring it to Plymouth, so that saved me some time – so it actually put me a little ahead of schedule. I bobtailed to where my pre-loaded trailer was, hooked up and all went well. Whew.
Got to my delivery location and walked up as they were unlocking their doors. Perfect timing. I was even 1-1/2 hours early for my appointment. They called me with a dock door assignment sometime after 6pm, giving me high hopes because now I was a whole hour ahead of schedule – I was going to have time for a run (that I wanted to do ALL DAY but just didn’t have a good window of time to do yet) AND I was gonna get home!
But then I sat. And sat. And sat. I watched my elog time clock tick, tick, tick down. If I got going by 9pm I miiiiiight still make it. Nope. At 9:30 I got my signed bills and could go. I had 90 minutes to drive 45 miles, fuel my reefer, clean it out, check it in, post-trip it, and drop it. Getting another 60 miles beyond that towards home wasn’t happening. So I settled.
“I’ll drop my trailer, bobtail to Walmart, park there and run the rec trail that’s there.” I was going to go for my run. Finally.
By the time I arrived at the drop location, I had 18 minutes left on my 14-hour clock. Nobody was around to check me in, so I dropped the trailer, left a message to let them know and took the hell off so I could at least get to the truck stop down the road to park for the night. By the time I rolled in and parked I had 3 minutes left of my 14 hour day. I post-tripped, changed into my jammies and crawled right into my bunk without even brushing my teeth or taking my vitamins. Or going for my run.
F*** it. Tomorrow is my New Year.
Today I love team driving. I miss some things about being solo, but… Today I also love cuddles. It’s a two-fer today. 😊