Good-bye to a friend. Way too soon.

Richard

We’re going to miss you, Richard.

Over my spring break while Adam and I were in Phillips, I received some terrible news. I came upstairs at my parent’s house after a short run on my mom’s treadmill. Adam came up to me, gently put his hand on my arm and said, “I need to talk to you about something.” I sensed urgency in his voice and immediately knew something was terribly wrong. He led me to the couch and sat me down. He received a call that our friend, Richard, was killed in a car accident.

I felt a lump in my throat and my stomach knotted. I think I just blanked out for a few seconds… or minutes… I don’t even know. So many things went through my head in such a short amount of time. As tears built up in my eyes, my thoughts started to jump all over the place. “What about this, and what about that… and… Meryl… ohmygosh, Meryl… and 4imprint… and legos… and friends… and how? Why? Is this for real? No… noooo…”

For the past few days I’ve thought a LOT about Richard and Meryl. Our mutual friends, work, and in all the places where he will be remembered and missed. The world will miss such an incredibly intelligent, fun-loving guy.

Richard and Meryl.

Richard and Meryl. Love and laughs. <3

What to say… I just don’t know. So I’m using this grieving tactic – a letter. Sometimes you don’t get a chance to say good-bye, so I guess… I hope you are able to read this, my friend.

Dear Richard,
You left us all too soon, my friend, and we already miss you more than we can even put into words. It still doesn’t feel real most of the time. It’s almost like I’m going to head home, meet up with you and Meryl and our group for happy hour and you’re going to tell us all about the accident. We’re going to hug and smile and be glad we still have each other. I think I’m stuck in this strange half-reality. Like the accident happened, but you’re still with us. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been out of town and unable to see anyone or what. When it comes down to it, I sadly know it’s real, as much as I want to wish it all a horrible dream. I wake up each morning thinking about Meryl and wondering how she’s doing, your family, 4imprint, our shared friends, and you.

There are places in my life that will never again be the same without you. Any time I see a Lego, I will remember you. Whenever I play Pictionary, I’ll warm up my drawing skills like you always have. Any time I’m kayaking, tubing or playing shuffleboard, I’ll remember the fun times I had when I shared those times with you.

I always enjoyed your playful personality, and appreciated your sense of adventure and immediate willingness to go along with sometimes crazy ideas. “Hey! Let’s drag our kayaks a mile through the woods so we can paddle this class IV rapids!” or “I know! Let’s ride this air mattress down the river!” (I do believe that one was your idea.) Yeah… I’m going to miss you – especially those times. What I will miss most about you is the sibling-like friendship we had and your genuine, contagious laugh. Your spirit is irreplaceable and unforgettable.

My friend, we all love you, we all miss you, and I know you’ll be watching over us all. We will all do our best to help your love and our friend, Meryl, through her grief and be there for her. For her, and for you.

When we meet again, Richard, maybe I’ll finally let ya’ win at a game of shuffle board (and yeah, I know… you win most of the time). Oh, and the Sambuca’s on me.

Miss you, buddy.
Love, Robin


Tonight I love the people in my life. All of them. You can’t ever say “I love you” too much. Say it as much as you’re able because so much can change so fast.

I love you.

Richard relaxing on a kayak

Richard knew how to relax on a kayak.

Richard and kayaks

Richard proud of his rig. He was able to get all 3 of our kayaks loaded onto his car.

Kayak

Tubing with Richard

We were all laughing hysterically as our tubes were loosing air. This is one of my favorite memories with Richard.

Until we meet again... Good bye, our good friend.

Until we meet again… Good bye, our good friend.

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9 thoughts on “Good-bye to a friend. Way too soon.

  1. If the measurement of a person’s presence can be expressed by the sum of the memories left behind with those whose lives he has touched, then Richard’s is incalculable.

  2. Robin,
    Thank you for putting into print what we’re all feeling! We got the call the night it happened and the grief is relentless and beyond description. And, those photos say it all…he was the dream companion for Meryl, friend and mentor to countless people in all walks of life, and the perfect son in law for Rock and me.

    We send you love and gratitude,
    Sherrill Anderson

  3. I’m so so so sorry you lost a good friend. I’m sure he knows he was very well loved by you.

    I think that when people leave us in the physical realm, that the spiritual stays with us. Matter can’t be created nor destroyed and our spirit lives on to watch over our loved ones. I’m sure he’s there with you all.

    I’m sure he’s saying “wow! Wait till you see all these great things! So much more adventures to have!” I’m sure he will wait for you all to join him in lifetimes to come so you all can have the adventures together. <3

  4. Thank you for this, it’s beautifully written. I have so many fond childhood memories of my cousin Richard as we were growing up, but its lovely to see the wonderful memories of someone who knew Richard in more recent times.

  5. Thank you Robyn for your beautiful words. We so, so appreciate them. We had four sons and now one of them is gone. We miss him so much. Please always be there for Meryl. Greta and John.

  6. Thank you Robin for your kind words and thoughts for my dear cousin Richard. i know they are a comfort for Meryl and his family and friends,

    Sharon x x

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